Palin Parade

There is something quite beguiling about the Sarah Palin story. Growing up in the wilds of Alaska, a former beauty queen turned sports reporter turned small town mayor and then governor; a member of the so-called “elite six” – six women of Wasilla, sharing the trials and the traumas, the ups and the downs of working and bringing up children in long dark winters of Alaska. The love story – she married her high school sweetheart, “quite a package,” her own words, (and my one track mind), the happy, successful, moose-hunting family, the beautiful children, the unexpected and unplanned pregnancy which she and her husband hid from everyone, including their own kids, until she was seven months pregnant because she was afraid of how it would be perceived by the people of Alaska. (She even succeeded in hiding it from the most (dare I say), elite of Fashion Police, Vogue Magazine, who photographed her when she was five months pregnant and (apparently) didn’t notice a thing. Quel Coup!). There’s also her extraordinary resilience – traveling to Texas to deliver a speech on energy when she was eight months pregnant, (no mention of how risky such a thing is for any mother so late in a pregnancy), and delivering that speech anyway despite the fact that her waters had broken that very morning, far, far away from her home in Alaska. (She in fact returned home and gave birth the following day.) And then of course there is the baby himself, Trig, born with Down Syndrome (she had known and chosen to give birth anyway, something that has been claimed by the pro-life constituency as credential enough to be vice president), and her extraordinary ability to juggle family and job, carrying Trig around in a sling for the first months of his life (who doesn’t love that image, a mother, young baby, doing it all?) There is, you know it, a movie in there somewhere.

But. Does this mean that she has what it takes to be the vice president, (a heart beat away, etc etc)? At the Republican National Convention last week in Minneapolis there was absolutely no hesitation. She certainly does. The reasons were varied – some attributed to her – “She’s a regular human being,” Kim Skipper, an Alaskan delegate said, “she’s like normal, average America,” or from Kailee Higgins, “being mayor of Wasilla, even though it’s a small city, it’s the practical experience that you need and she’s going to be great” – and some reasons attributed to the state itself – “When you have a state that is flanked by Russia, flanked by Canada,” Skipper says, “we have missile defense in our state, we are building a trans Canada pipeline …” And from Nick Stepovich, a delegate who had just gotten hold of a “drill baby drill” t-shirt and who worked “real hard” to get Sarah Palin elected Governor, “Alaska’s positioning is global. It’s the number one air route, heck Alaska was owned by Russia!” He adds, (just in case you are worried about Governor Palin’s foreign policy experience), “she’s met with Mongolian Leaders.” Somehow I feel so much better.

So yes. The delegates at the RNC Convention last week had their talking points down pat and they exuded confidence in and love for their gal. They heralded her “executive” experience in “small town” America and the “liberal elite’s” attempts to bash her. They disparaged Barack Obama’s community service, his stance on the war in Iraq, his support for Habeaus Corpus. They listened to messengers like the former Mayor of New York (who appeared on stage with a photo of the altered landscape that is now Downtown Manhattan in the background, a not so subtle reminder of what happens when we let the terrorists win) describe Sarah Palin as the most popular Governor in America and Obama as a “celebrity senator.” (One apparently is good, the other oh-so-bad). And they congratulated each other and celebrated with each other a mighty fine pick.

But to rain (just a little bit) on this Palin parade. Pride comes before a fall. Sarah Palin revealed earlier this week that she doesn’t get the details. And later this week she sits down with ABC’s Charlie Gibson, who, despite the fact that he lost his lustre during ABC’s hatchet job on Barack Obama back in April, will still, in order to retain any credibility as a journalist, have to ask her about that bridge to no-where, about the state trooper investigation, about her stance on evolution, her opinion on the separation of church and state, and whether she really, truly believes that the war in Iraq is God’s plan. Brilliant rhetoric written by Rovian scriptwriters won’t be able to help her here.

And one more thing: the other block on which this parade will surely stumble, the other bit of silver lining, a squeak of light at the end of the tunnel for anyone who is, right now, freaking out because they think, “ohmiGOD it’s happening again!” is the Palin Parade’s misguided belief that Sarah Palin for Vice President will woo over Hillary Clinton’s Supporters. At the Republican Convention, Kailee Higgins went so far as to describe Governor Palin as the “republican flip side of Hillary,” and when asked about the pro-life-pro-choice issue, dismissed it as nothing of real significance. “There are other aspects that surpass that,” she said, assuredly, “ and people can look past it.”

I don’t think so. And if this movie is to have a happy ending, most American People won’t think so either.